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Olliemead, Rochas, Bobrisky and 7 others who should be given dirty slaps

Rochas, Zuma

Weekly rounds are back and we have collaborated with our man Ferdinand to curate list of all those who deserve dirty slaps this week. From Buhari’s media team to Osagie Alonge, see all 10.

Enjoy, share.

  1. Tosin Adeda

Ever wondered how a grown man would do something as petty as digging up old tweets to shame someone just after her wedding? Wonder no more, just ask Tosin Adeda. He went as far back as 2013 to dig up tweets where a certain Olliemead was yabbing short men, and mashed them up with a photo of her wedding picture, that shows her husband is short.

While some may cheer him on, we are sending him slaps for bringing the innocent man into all this, and acting like a petty child.

  1. OllieMead

This person deserves the most slaps this week. After years of body-shaming short men, she finally married one. The Internet never forgets fam and Tosin Adeda – who we’ve already slapped – exposed her hypocrisy, forcing her to deactivate her account.

But she came back almost immediately. And all she came to do was drag and expose her ‘former’ friend – Irose, who she once squatted with. Somebody that just got married should be enjoying her honeymoon, but since she decided to shame herself online, she deserves the slaps.

  1. iRose

Once upon a time, she was friends with Olliemead, but that friendship ended and with it came secrets and the public dry-cleaning of dirty linen. They actually do not deserve any more attention but due to popular demand, let’s slap them jungle justice style.

  1. Buhari’s media team

When the World Bank president said that President Buhari asked him to focus the global bank’s endeavors in Nigeria on the North, all hell broke loose. Considering his antecedents, a lot of people thought this was typical Buhari, favoring the north over other parts of Nigeria and there was plenty anger. Instead of the president’s media team to douse tensions by explaining how the World Bank’s relief efforts work – focusing on areas that are disadvantaged, etc – they released sorry-ass statements that summarily insisted that the President’s focus is on the North East indeed, and dismissed people’s anger as being politically motivated.

It took the mercurial Oby Ezekwesili who was once VP of the World bank to explain the prioritization of the North East over other parts of the country, for a lot of people to understand. What the President’s team couldn’t do, aunty Oby did in a few tweets. Slaps for them, claps for her!

  1. Osagie Alonge

Skales has been the butt of thousands of online jokes, but he has taken them all and stayed relevant. So when Osagie Alonge, popular music critic, tried to troll him by saying he copied Olamide in his video, Social Media will have none of it. They came in defense of the artiste and dragged Osagz to the moon and back. Even though he has gotten plenty heat, we are still sending a couple slaps to Osagie Alonge.

READ: For the first time ever, Nigerians unanimously defend Skales

  1. Chelsea and Arsenal

Because of these two teams, a lot of people lost money this week, while Bet9ja, Nairabet and the others smiled to the bank. Ordinary Crystal Palace and Watford defeated Chelsea and Arsenal respectively. Shame. Both teams deserve multiple slaps, from Batshuayi to Wenger. All. Of. Them.

  1. Rochas Okorocha

Don’t know why Jacob Zuma – of all people – has a statue in Imo State, and a road named after him, but the ridiculous governor Rochas Okorocha needs to explain, after we give him multiple slaps.

  1. Lialushh, ShelovesArtemis, PaidFella

If you are active on Twitter, you would have read about these people who have been fighting themselves, over a man, apparently. Last week, the scorned ex – Lialushh got Paidfella and his girlfriend Shelovesartemis arrested. At this point, we are tired of the story and who is at fault. We just want to land them dirty slaps and ensure the story dies with the slaps.

  1. Bobrisky and Tunde Ednut

As much as we do not want to give Bobrisky any attention, the shemale deserves to be slapped for being a nuisance. And struggling musician, Tunde Ednut deserves more slaps for always having a go at the cross dresser. This week, Tunde alleged Bobrisky was moving out of his house because he couldn’t afford to pay rent anymore.

Bobrisky countered by saying she is very much still there and did a video to prove it. In summary, both of them are mad and should be slapped multiple times.

  1. Figure it out/Greyroom haters.

Inspired by the BKChat format, a new wave of candid shows are in town, and they are leading conversations on Twitter and Instagram every weekend. Themed around sex, relationships and pop-culture, these shows have spun a few haters who believe young Nigerians should focus on things that will make us stand a chance in the 2019 elections.

Obtuse reasoning, considering entertainment is big in this country and people should be allowed to do what they like, when they like. In addition to these, if you feel like young people are not doing enough, start something, and people will support you (if you make sense).

Slaps for the haters.

Written by Burmese Tyga

REAL!!! Last of a dying breed.

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