Emeka Nweze
Failure hurts badly and no one ever wants to experience it, but the sad reality is, it is inevitable, but what separates successes from the failures is the attitude. This might sound a little cliché but, virtually everyone who has achieved something great, whether an invention or a sporting milestone, experienced failure multiple times, the distinguishing factor is that they just never let it deter their ambitions or define them. The truth is that many people who experience failures focus on the desire not to fail, rather than the actual result, and because failure is almost bound to happen, it becomes their reality and they never really achieve their goals or complete projects.
Below are my tips on how you can use this inevitable failure to your advantage.
It is not ‘your thing’
In your life or career, you are most likely to fail a lot more than you actually succeed. This doesn’t make you a failure, and you shouldn’t see it as an identity, rather see it as an event and lesson, and move on right away. The truth is no one deliberately fails, and failure only happens because you were bold enough to take an action based on what you thought was going to work at that point in time but it didn’t, which is purely life. Time spent brooding and beating yourself up for constantly failing should be used to extract lessons and sharpen future decision-making to make sure that the setback doesn’t repeat itself or it is not as bad as before.
Change your Perspective
Instead constantly blaming your failure on physical traits like lack of intelligence and laziness, focus on the immediate causes like oversight or lateness. Blaming failure on physical traits gives the idea that you are not in control and there’s every chance that such a mistake or failure will happen again.
Have a plan
We have already established that failure is nothing more than an event which is most likely to occur over and over again. This however doesn’t mean that you should relax and wait until all your failures are exhausted, and then comes the successes, it doesn’t work like that. What makes failure a driver to success are the lessons you learnt and your ability to take those lessons and turn them into a plan to prevent future failures. Never sit and watch, or wait for someone else to come to your rescue after a setback, the onus is on you to pick yourself up, set out a plan and try again.
Persistence
When everything looks bleak and when it seems like you just can’t catch a break, persistence is what keeps you going. It’s never always easy to pick yourself up after experiencing failure, but understanding that it is just part of life and you owe it to yourself to keep going is important if you want to get back on track quickly and achieve that goal or breakthrough.
Be Optimistic
Optimism is difficult, especially when the setbacks seem to never stop and there it looks like there is no light at the end of the tunnel, imbibing that trait will go a long way in driving you towards your goals in the midst of every curve ball life throws at you. Optimism is what makes you see your failures as building blocks rather than a permanent condition or characteristic.
Don’t dwell
When you realise that you have hit a brick wall, the first instinct might be to look for a hammer to pull that wall down, especially if you’ve come a long way in terms of time and resources. However, sometimes, the wise decision would be to find another way, meaning that some paths lead to even more failures. You should be able to know when to call it quits with a futile endeavour and channel that energy to something else. This might be painful, but continuing on that path could lead to more heartache.
Don’t be afraid to fail
One of the biggest hindrances to success is the fear of failure because it stops you from trying and ultimately condemns you to a life of unrealized potential. In life, knowing what doesn’t work is worth more than knowing what does. Never be afraid to fail, rather, embrace trial and error because no one really has all the answers, you only learn as you walk through the earth. So, fail, learn and use that experience in your quest for success.
