Seunfunmi Joshua
Childhood in Nigeria is typically characterized by joyful moments of laughter, play, and learning, shaping individuals’ lives for years to come. However, certain phrases are commonly used in Nigerian upbringing, by parents, teachers, and peers alike, that have had a lasting impact, blending moments of fun with instances of trauma.
Today, we’re focusing on 10 such phrases that may have caused you distress at some point while growing up.
- Finish your food quickly. Your lesson teacher is here.
You already know what time it is when you hear your parents say this. Like you mean, after the whole stress from school’s work today, I should still prepare for extra lessons?
- Where’s your report card? What was your position in class?
This line made some instantly sick, especially when your parents or older uncles and aunties said it. It comes with an extra level of shame when you already had promised that you would make them proud and take the first position this time and it doesn’t happen as planned.
- I’ll deal with you when I get home.
At this point, there’s no saving you. You are so gone.
- Bring the money. Let me keep it for you.
Whenever we hear our moms say this, we just know it is far gone. You are never collecting it back.
- If you have not submitted your assignment, come outside.
A fondly used line by our teachers, so called big boys and girls will get whooped in the ass that day for sure.
- I’m going out now, don’t wash the plates you hear.
One of the most sarcastic ways of telling your child to get the chores done, like who does that? Our mums are so guilty of this, do you agree?
- If I go and look for it and find it there, what should I do to you?
Like… Oh my goodness.. I’ve searched and searched the whole place, what else do you want me to do?
- Mummy Nurse is here, get ready to take your injection.
You mean Mummy Nurse is going to see my bumbum today?
- The Noisemakers list is complete. Once you hear your name, come outside.
Some of us didn’t stop appearing on this list.
- You are resuming boarding school next week
You just know they have had enough of you in the house. The only way to get you out of the picture for a while is by sending you to boarding school.
Wrapping Up
For us Nigerians growing up in Nigeria, there were certain experiences that almost all of us shared, the use of these lines or phrases being one of them.
While some of these sayings may have been meant positively and shaped us, others were so distressing that we’d rather forget them quickly.
What are your thoughts on this?
