“I knew every Premier League fixture, not because I loved football, but because my relationship depended on it.”
On today’s episode of Why The Ship Sank, we spoke to Cynthia (25, F), who shares how her relationship fell apart because her boyfriend’s biggest commitment wasn’t to her, it was to betting.
Q: How did you meet him?
He was my colleague at my former workplace.
At first, we barely spoke because we worked in different departments. But we’d bump into each other in the cafeteria or while leaving the office, and eventually we became friends. Liked really close friends.
The funny thing was that everybody around us started shipping us before anything even happened.
People would tease us whenever we walked into the office together. We kept insisting we were just friends.
Eventually, the office won.
Q: How long did it take before you started dating?
Almost a year.
By then, everybody had stopped pretending to be surprised.
It honestly felt nice.
Q: Did you have any major issues at the beginning?
Not really.
But there was just one thing. He loved football.
I didn’t think much of it because I enjoy football too. In fact, it gave us something to talk and argue about.
It was fun.
Until I realised there was more to it.
Q: Which is?
Everything about football had money attached to it.
He wasn’t watching matches because he loved the game, he was watching because he’d staked money on almost every match.
If there were ten matches that day, chances were he’d placed bets on eight.
That’s when I realised I wasn’t dating a football fan, I was dating a gambler. He was addicted!
Q: When did it start affecting the relationship?
He never had money for me, but for betting. Sometimes, I just genuinely want my man to pay for stuff, buy me gifts and whatnot but it never happens…even on my birthday. He’d give excuses and tell me, once he wins this, I’ll be the first benefactor.
Funnily enough, he almost always lost every bet. He never had that luck.
Also, he borrowed a lot, as much as he staked a lot. I didn’t know his exact salary though but with the position he holds in the company, I knew he was earning really well. But it was never obvious.
Q: Did you see these signs before you both started dating?
The thing is, I never even had to bill him. I was comfortable on my own. I never thought to ask him for anything because I felt we were not dating…so I really shouldn’t.
Q: And he never gave you anything?
Well, he paid for my food a number of times. But when we became official, I left the company about 2 months in. I got a better offer.
Q: At what moment did everything eventually end?
It was gradual sha. Not like we had a big fight or anything. We became really distant because I didn’t feel I wanted that kind of man for myself. So I gave that space. He came around a couple of times, but I’d always give him cold shoulders…until he got tired himself and we stopped talking finally.
It’s been about 7 months since we spoke. So yeah, I believe we’re no longer together even if anyone asks him right now.
So that was how it ended.
